In the depths of my Document folder

[lar_laughs]

Today I decided to clean up Millan a little bit. I've been neglecting cleaning him out just because I don't have the time to truly dedicate myself to the task. I went through my pictures first because those are the easiest to clean out.

Then I went to the Documents folder. Inside are all the stories I wrote while I was "off computer" for that year and a half. I created this WORLD that I had forgotten about until now. It was a time of healing for me and this writing was cathartic, not meant for public consumption. I created a world and a concept and then peopled it with bits of my psyche so that I could understand what was going on inside my head and heart and soul. I'm not talking about a few thousand words strung together, either. This is not my normal drabbling. This is twenty or so thousand words that all string together with some coherence to form a pretty complete two-thirds of a story.

I'd love to share it but the problem is that I don't know if I can read through it again. I might need more time. More distance. I'm amazed that it's still there, waiting for me. Amazing how the brain copes because I had forgotten all about it until this moment. Wow!

Comments

[innerslytherin]

It really is amazing how we can totally forget about our darkest moments and move forward on a daily basis. When I look back at my sophomore year in college, for instance, I realize that I was clinically depressed. Never suicidal, but in serious need of medication and therapy. I got through it without that, got out of the situation, moved forward, and...forgot about it. Only 10 years later did I really look back at that and realize everything that went on.

*hugs* Give yourself permission to wait as long as necessary to read those files, but keep them.

[lar_laughs.livejournal.com]

I'm still taking it one day at a time. That's all our human brains can handle. I knew I was making progress when I could live in the moment even while looking at something like this. Hooray! There's another side to all of this.